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FAD STUDY GUIDE TEST 2 Chapter 8 Love is Attachment theory types of attachments Love and Loving Relationships An enduring bond between two or more people Based on affection and emotion Includes a feeling of obligation toward another a strong affection for one another rising out of kinship or personal ties attraction based on sexual desire affection based on admiration benevolence or common interests different types friend sibling parent romantic partner Learn about love very early in life John Bowlby Secure attachment o Securely attached 70 Insecure attachment o Anxious 15 o Avoidant 15 Distressed when away but when the parent comes back they aren t happy but upset that the parent left in general o Disorganized fearful The strange situation Attachment in the beginning children infants stay close to their parents for survival completely dependent creates attachments which influence attachments to others in life Attachment type where infants feel safe when their mothers are out of sight Infants become nervous when their parent leaves the room and can show rejection when the parent returns Infants show little attachment to primary parent o Forms schemas of people situations apply these schemas to other people o Enter a relationship with preconceived notions Secure attachment Anxious ambivalent attachment Avoidant attachment Internal working model Perspectives on love Biological Micro level Courtly love Feminization of love Romantic love Companionate love Attachment in romantic relationships Biological Perspective sociobiological perspective biochemical perspective Macro level a poetic stle of the middle ages when poets would write songs of unrequited love and present them at the court of their royal masters process in which love became associated with the provate work of women in the home namely nurturing and caring for family members a type of love characterized by passion melodrama and excitement type of love that grows over time based on strong commitment friendship and trust Secure attachment easy to get close to others Anxious attachment others don t feel like getting close as I do and it scares them away Avoidant attachment don t feel comfortable being close to others secure can get close to others depend on others doesn t worry about being abandoned 1 2 anxious ambivalent worries partner doesn t really love them gets close to partner before they get close to them avoidant not comfortable being close to someone difficult to trust How biology shapes our social life purpose of love is to pass on genes how would this be different for men and women Based on raising babies women fertility men our brain releases chemicals when we encounter with someone with desirable characteristics Give a rush as we experience attraction Addicted to love perhaps infatuation Dopamine naturally produced in our brains acts upon the pleasure center o When people are newly in love they tend to have higher brain levels of dopamine o Initial craving Oxytocin the love or cuddle hormone o related to feelings of deep friendship trust sexuality love bonding and commitment o Facilitates nurturing behaviors o Long term intimacy Sternberg theor that sees loce as having three elements Defined passion intimacy and commitment types of love attraction romance sexual arousal quickest to develop and quickest to fade Micro level perspectives Theory of Love Passion Sternberg Commitment Sternberg Types of love Sternberg Intimacy Sternberg closeness and bonding self disclosure respect trust warmth develops more slowly determination to develop the relationship expecting the good and the bad develops gradually Infatuated love just passion Empty love just commitment Romantic love intimacy passion Fatuous love commitment passion Liking intimacy Companionate love commitment intimacy Consummate love All three Styles of love Eros Storge Pragma Ludus Agape Mania Wheel Theory of love development Lee categorized 6 types of love Eros storge pragma ludus agape mania passionate strong physical attraction companionate mutual love respect trust practical sensible playful carefree causal altruistic kind patient obsessive possessive intense Reiss 1 Rapport sharing interests and activities 2 Self revelation sharing intimate information e g fears 3 Mutual dependency depend on partner Macro level perspective What does our culture tell us about love Controlling the development of love Unrequited love Keeping love involves Love Men vs women Do men and women care differently Love languages Gary Chapman Keeping love John Gottman Theory of uncoupling 4 Personality need fulfillment lives intertwined Marring cousin Dowry Different messages you get about love intimacy from your family A macro level perspective on love suggesting that all societies control or channel love Through the following child marriage have child before love in a marriage kinship rules restrict set of people can cannot marry isolation of young segregating young people boys girls close supervision When one person s feelings are not reciprocated by the other person in the relationship recognizing the relationships importance having supportive communication deciding to spend time together INTENTIONAL be active in the relationship not passive Who is more likely to be looking for a relationship men report falling in love sooner men feminization of love in our culture lovey things are expected from the girls women express love more than men men tend to be more ludic women tend to be more storge and pragma both value psychic and sexual intimacy the way we feel and show love words of affirmation acts of service receiving gifts quality time physical touch 5 to 1 ratio 5 positive interaction to every 1 negative interaction for a healthy relationship turn toward one another when things get tough enhance your love map knowing you partner soft start up let your partner influence you solve your solvable problems unrequited love one person is no longer wanting to willing to be in the relationship while the other is still engaged in the relationship suggests there is a turning point initiator knows it is over and has time to process the breakup uncoupling complete when being partners is no longer a major source of identity unrequited love initiator uncoupling Breaking up Chapter 9 Sexual relationships Sex Intersexed Gender Sexual orientation Transgender Transsexual Bi gender Cunnilingus Fellatio Masturbation Menarche Studying sex Freud Alfred Kinsey Williams Masters and Virginia Johnson


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FSU FAD 2230 - TEST 2

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