Power and Violence in Marriages & FamiliesTypes of PowerCoercive power: ability to punish, parentReward power: ability to give things, parentExpert power: expertise over someoneInformational power: convinces someone, blackmailReferent power: survival based on not having powerLegitimate power: power given to you, police officerMartial PowerFirst studied in the 1950’sBlood and Wolfe: interviewed wives onlyResource hypothesis: the spouse with more resource has more power in marriageWhat resources do spouses bring?Most families (72%) had “relatively egalitarian” decision-making structure25% husbands made decisions3% wives made decisionsCriticisms of StudyWhat domains men and women have power overWomen: food, shopping, cleaningHusbands: where they live, jobs, finances“having the power to make trivial decisions is not the same as having the power to make important ones”Resources & GenderMen tend to have more resourcesMoneyEducationStatusPhysical strengthAlternative to marriageWomen tend to be most equal with men at the beginning of marriageFirst pregnancy and birth diminishes women’s resourcesFemale may take time off and lose incomeDependent on males to be father and earnerHave less energy to resist dominance of husbandFuture of Martial PowerWorking women are happier in their marriagesMore financial freedomPsychological benefitsMutually economically dependent couplesCouples in which each partner earns 40 to 50% of the couples incomeWomen’s resources may increase in value: caring, emotional support, warmth, nurturingEquality between men and women may occur on overall societyFour Couple TypesHeterosexual married, heterosexual cohabitating, lesbian, and gayMarried and cohabitating heterosexuals, least egalitarianGay and lesbian share domestic duties more (including child-rearing)Gays more competitive; lesbians more relationally focusedPower and intimacyIntimacy is the greatest when power is equalNo power = equal power in relationshipSeek to negotiate and compromise, not to winPower PoliticsHow do spouses exert power in a marriage?Leaving/threateningWithholding/distancingPouting/sulkingInfidelityAccumulation of power politics leads to loneliness and distance in marriageAlternatives to Power PoliticsPartners may take charge of separate domainsMay decrease intimacyReinforces “separateness”Subordinate spouse disengages from power strugglesMore powerful partner relinquishes some power to save or enhance the marriageFamily Violence“all forms of abuse have at their center the exploitation of a power difference”child abuse, elder abuse, husband abusedating violence, domestic violence (living within the same home), sexual coercionThree-phase Cycle of ViolenceTension resulting from some minor altercation builds over a period of timeSituation escalates, exploding into another violence episodeViolent person becomes contrite, treating his/her spouse or partner lovinglyverbal violence existsTypes of ViolenceIntimate partner violence: violence committed by spouses, ex-spouses, or current/former boyfriends/girlfriends, including same-sex partnersPatriarchal terrorism: controlling the partner through fear and intimidationCommon couple violence: mutual violence with a specific argument; younger couples, usually grow out of thisWhy do Abusers Do It?Feelings of powerlessnessLack of resourcesInsecurityAny other explanations?Alcohol, substance useLearned pattern of behaviorMental health, personality disordersWhy do victims put up with it?FearCultural normsLove, economic dependence, and hopesGendered socializationChildhood experiencesLow self-esteemChildren and ViolenceChild Abuse: physical, sexual, emotional*Child Neglect: legal responsibility*Sibling Violence*equally damagingToday’s High US Divorce RateOn average, 40 to 50% of marrieds can expect to have their marriages dissolve over the life courseThe divorce rate is about 50% for first marriagesThe divorce rate is about 65% for second marriagesWhy are couples divorcing?Various factors can bind marriages and families, including:Economic interdependenceLegal, social, and moral constraintsSpouse’s relationshipThe binding strength of some of these factors has lessenedEconomic FactorsWives in the labor forcesIndependence effectIncome effectHigh expectations of marriageThe changed nature of marriage itselfDecreased social, legal, and moral constraintsIntergenerational transmission of divorceOther Factors Associated with DivorceRemarried mates are more likely to divorceCohabitation before marriage increases the likelihood of divorcePremarital pregnancy may increase the risk of divorce in a subsequent marriageRemaining child-free is associated with higher likelihood of divorceRace and ethnicity are differentially associated with the chances of divorcingAmericans have come full circle on divorceToday, people are likely to say either make getting a divorce harder or keep it the same; fewer want divorce made easierShould Divorce Be More Difficult to Obtain?“Would I be happier?”Previously-unhappy married couples who did not divorce and who turned their marriage fell into three broad types:The martial endurance ethic: out last your problemsThe martial work ethic: work through your problemsThe personal happiness ethic: focus on yourselfAre People Happier After a Divorce?Compared to marrieds, divorced peopleHave lowered levels of life satisfactionMore negative general moodPoorer physical healthMore depressedSomewhat more inclined to suicideThose in unhappy marriages tend to be more depressed than divorced individualsGetting the Divorce1) Emotional Divorce: withdraw positive contact2) Legal Divorce: exactly what is sounds like3) Community Divorce: people separate community, friends4) Psychic Divorce: understanding you’re no longer a couple5) Economic Divorce: financial aspects of divorceEconomic Consequences of Divorce for Men and WomenWomen are the losers….Men and women’s unequal wages“equitable” division of property in divorce….but so are men (who earn less than 80% of the family’s income)more women are workingchild supportReasons for Negative Impact of Divorce on ChildrenLife stress PerspectiveParental loss PerspectiveParental Adjustment PerspectiveEconomic Hardship PerspectiveInter-parental Conflict PerspectiveWhat are the Effects of Divorce on Children?Long-term effectsAge and Sex of ChildWhich is worse for children, divorce or marital conflict?High-conflict marriage that does not end in divorceLow-conflict marriage that
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