Chapter 10 Power and Violence in Families 1 Power a ability to meet one s needs b in intimate relationships the ability to influence partner to get what one wants c difference in power in intimate relationships problem 2 Why people want power a b to feel control over their lives sense of personal power and assertiveness to do what they are supposed to do according to i society legitimate power ii family learned patterns and methods 3 The need for power over others a compensation for deep sense of inferiority and insecurity b c d maintaining power in a marriage to keep an attachment figure close to stay in control 4 Sources of power a culture norms b gender norms c one earning money d education and knowledge i expert power ii informational power communication skills e personality f g give or withhold affection h physical strength and stature i j alternatives in life children s needs 5 Marital Power a Components i Decision making who gets to make decisions about everything ii Division of Labor Who earns money Who does work around the house iii Allocation of Money Who controls the family money iv Sense of Empowerment Who has the most influence b Patterns i Egalitarian equal power between partners 1 Highest marital satisfaction ii male dominant iii female dominant 1 less satisfied iv Mutually Economically Dependent Spouses 1 A dual earner couples in which each spouse earns between 40 59 of the family s income a 20 of all duel earner couples v Neotradtional Family 1 Formal male dominance in decision making and an egalitarian spirit at home c Concepts i Objective measures of power 1 Who actually makes more or more important decisions ii Subjective measure of fairness 1 Equity the rewards and privileges of the relationship proportional to the contributions of the partners 2 Equality both partners share equally in the rights and responsibilities of the relationship iii Resource Hypothesis 1 The partner with the most resources has the most power 6 Power Base a Coercive Power b Reward Power violence gifts and favor c Expert Power i Ability and willingness to punish the partner 1 Partner sulks refuses to talk and withholds sex physical i Ability and willingness to give partner material or non material i Knowledge ability judgment 1 Saving and investing decisions shaped by partner with more education or experience in financial matters d Informational Power i Knows more about consumer item childrearing travel destination housing market health issues 1 Persuades other parent about most effective mode of child discipline citing experts books e Referent Power i Emotional identification with partner 1 Partner agrees to purchase of house or travel plans preferred by the other because she or he wants to make partner happy f Legitimate Power partner or both i Society and culture authorizes the power of one or the other 1 In traditional marriage husband has final authority as head of household current ideal is that of equal partners 7 Power Politics vs No Power Relationships a No Power i Does not mean that one partners exerts little or no power It means that each partner has the ability to mutually and ii reciprocally influence and be influenced by the other iii Partners do not seek to exercise their relative power over each other iv Partners seek to negotiate and compromise not WIN v Partners avoid power politics vi Like to participate in Power processes that help 1 discussing explaining asking or telling 2 bargaining and negotiating 3 persuading 4 being nice 8 Power Politics a Most likely to engage in Power processes that harm i acting helpless or dependant ii overprotecting iii deceiving lying or outwitting iv criticizing v scapegoat 9 Consequences of Power Politics lack of power psychological distress a b high level of power produces psychological change i begin to exploit one that can control ii become unfeeling and abusive c extreme imbalances cause negative effects in relationship i discourages intimacy d balanced power leads to maximized marital satisfaction e equitable relationships are more stable and satisfying 10 Types of communication i verbal convey info reveal emotions stroking function ii nonverbal language of signs and signals direct actions eyes b Self disclosure i willingness to share self with others is critical to good communication ii couple should match each other in level of self disclosure iii choose WHAT to share and WHEN to share it c Arguing Constructively i develop perspective that includes both peoples points of view ii see issue as our problem to solve iii summarize partner s point of view iv do something positive for partner v attack one problem at a time vi vii viii be flexible ix only can change you x argue differently than before focus on emotions not negative actions recognize defense mechanisms 11 Family Violence a All forms of abuse have exploitation of a power difference at the center b The use of physical violence to gain or demonstrate power in a family relationship has occurred throughout history but only recently has family violence been labeled a social problem c Major Sources of Family Violence Intimate Partner Violence i 1 Physical or emotional abuse by a Spouses b Ex spouses c Current or former boyfriends or girlfriends 2 A pattern of behavior that seeks to establish power and control over another person though fear and intimidation intimate terrorism ii Situational Couple Violence arguments that get physical 1 Pushing shoving slapping 2 more prevalent among younger couples 3 most mature out of it d Physical Abuse i Measured by the Conflict Tactics Scale ii Consists of 1 Beating kicking pushing hitting with objects stabbing strangling shooting iii All social groups iv Most likely Women 1 Young non white less educated lower household income 2 Females of any race are more likely then males 3 Native American Females are the most likely Followed by e Marital Rape Black females i Sexual abuse is often combined with other physical violence 1 Rape is about power not sex ii Forcing sex upon a wife is a crime in all states 12 Gender Issues in Intimate Partner Violence a Why Do Men Do It i Usually stems from a powerless feeling Inability to earn a salary 1 2 Employment in a low status job 3 High school dropout coercive power b Why Do Women Live with it i FEAR ii Cultural Norms ii Absent a reward power base for family power some men report to 1 Historically men were allowed to physical chastise an errant wife iii Love Economic Dependence and Hope for Reform 1
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