FAD2230 Exam 2 Ch 6 10 Ch 6 Communication messages Communication interactive process that uses symbols like words and gestures to both send and receive Sapir Whorf hypothesis concept that language shapes our culture and at the same time our culture Is a transaction Is a process Includes co construction of meanings 1 2 3 4 Uses symbols shapes our language Cultural Differences 1 Words constantly changing ex Cell phone laptop Individualist vs collectivist 1 2 High vs low context 3 Masculine vs feminine men are viewed as better than women 4 High vs low ambiguity clear cut rules 5 Short term vs long term orientation Listening process of giving thoughtful attention to what we hear 1 Receive it 2 Understand it 3 Remember it 4 Evaluate it 5 Respond to it Active listening extremely attentive good eye contact asking questions paraphrasing Verbal communication spoken exchange of thoughts feelings or other messages Women 1 More likely to use conversation to establish and maintain relationship 2 Smile more 3 More non verbal communication 4 Have a hard time hiding emotions Men 1 Want to get straight to the point 2 Need to give or receive information what s your number your email 3 Less likely to convey emotions 4 In mixed sex conversations men normally dominate conversation and tend to say more and talk for longer periods of time Why do men and women communicate differently 1 Women use both hemispheres of their brain 2 Both social and biological factors contribute Self disclosure telling a person something private about yourself that he or she would not otherwise Conflict disagreements over decision making problem solving which can result from differences between group members in personality perception information tolerance for risk and power of influence have known Types of Conflict 1 Pseudo conflict falsely perceiving that our partner is interfering with our goals 2 Content conflict individuals disagree about information 3 Value conflict results from differing opinions on subjects that relate to personal values and issues of right wrong 4 Ego conflict individuals believe they must win at all costs to save face John Gotman famous marriage researcher 1 Regulating couples couples who use communication to promote closeness and intimacy 2 Nonregulated couples couples who have many negative communication exchange Movie The Story of Us argument listen to their spouse Contempt feeling superior to your spouse such as rolling your eyes while he or she is talking Defensiveness this is an effort to defend yourself and your position when you feel attacked in an Criticism this includes making negative evaluations of your spouse s behavior or feelings Stonewalling this is a type of withdrawal technique in which some people show how they refuse to Belligerence this challenging behavior is meant to establish power in the marital relationship Examples in the movie 1 Criticism While they are taking their children to camp the father and the children are singing and they are driving behind a home attached to a truck The mom freaks out and yells at him for not passing the home 2 Stonewalling After they dropped the kids off at camp he drops her off at the home and before she gets out of the car he wants to talk to her about their marriage but she just slams the door in his face 3 Stonewalling Later on in the movie they go out to dinner together and talk about their marriage She tells him that it s over and he walks out Ch 7 Marriage Marriage legally and socially recognized relationship that includes sexual economic and social rights responsibilities Early view marriage only heterosexual men were head of household Sexual revolution pre marital sex marriage for love 19th century challenged the idea of monogamy in marriage Industrial revolution young went to cities to look for work so it gave them a chance to meet new people Marital decline perspective The view that the institution of marriage is increasingly being threatened by hedonistic pursuits of personal happiness at the expense of long term commitment Marital resilience perspective view that overall marriage is no weaker than in the past but that all families need an increase in structural supports over time Homogamous marriage married to someone similar to them social class race Interracial marriage spouses come from different racial groups 1 Asians most likely 2 Whites least likely Heterogamous marriage different from you race social class Anitmiscegentation laws law forbidding interracial marriage until 1967 1 Loving vs Virginia supreme court case outlawing it Same sex marriage 1 Joint parenting 2 3 Adoption Insurance benefits Civil Union public policy designed to extend some benefits to partners who are not legally married Changing attitudes 1 Non marital sex it s okay 2 Cohabitation people of all ages are okay with it 3 Non marital childbearing not as okay with it 4 Shared bread winning women 50 5 Division of household labor women still do most of house work Marriage premium concept that married people are happier healthier and financially better off than those who are not married Selection effect hypothesis that people who marry may be different from those who do not marry Marriage better for men they tend to be healthier than bachelors married men tend to make more Social capital goods ad services that are by products of social relationships money Types of Marriages Conflict habitual marriage this type of marriage is filled with tension and verbal and perhaps physical conflict but the partners do not feel these are reasons to divorce They believe fighting is a normal part of marriage and is an acceptable way to communicate and solve problems Devitalized marriage Although the couple may have been in love when they married their relationship now exists without much passion They spend time together but from obligation or habit children jobs community rather than for the joy of being together Passive congenial marriage These partners may have married with low expectations of intimacy marriage would provide and their expectations have remained low Little conflict and little excitement Vital marriage lives of the partners are intertwined in this type of marriage Both physical and emotional intimacies are important to them and they work hard at communication and compromise so their relationship continues to be satisfying and enjoyable Total marriage partners have considerable energy invested in each other and their marriage is a priority They share
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