Cole FriedesFAD 2230 Exam 2 Study GuideChapter 6: Communication, Conflict, and PowerThe Importance of Communication-Most problems in marriage stem from ineffective communication betweenpartners.-Communication: the interactive process that uses symbols like words and gesturesto both send and receive messages. -There are four main general concepts of communication:1. Communication is a transaction—all human behavior is a continuousexchange.2. Communication is a process—it is dynamic and always changingdepending on sex, race, culture, ethnicity etc.3. Communication includes co-construction of meanings—two people canhear two completely different things.4. Communication uses symbols—used to construct meanings or definitions.Cultural Context of Communication-Sapir-Whorf Hypothesis: the concept that language shapes our culture, and at thesame time, our culture shapes our language. (Ex: if you lived in the 1950’s and triedto tell someone to “just Google it” then they wouldn’t understand. The differences inculture is affected by its language used and vice versa)-Race and ethnicity also greatly affect communication-People from different races, or even different geographical locations usedifferent dialects (Ex: Ebonics or a southern slang)-Breaking Code: refers to when you change from your natural dialect to moreproper English when talking to a potential employer/certain audience. Types of Communication-Listening: the process of giving thoughtful attention to what we hear.-To actually be listening to must do the following:1. Must receive message2. Must understand and decode it3. Must retain message for a period of time4. We need to evaluate the message5. We must respond to the message -Active Listening: when you are extremely attentive, with god eye contact and bodylanguage, and encourage the other person to continue talking.-If you are able to paraphrase what someone has said, you are activelylistening.-Verbal Communication: the spoken exchange of thought, feelings, or othermessages.-We typically tend to believe body language more than verbal communication andwe can recognize feedback more appropriately via body language.-Ex: If you are texting on your phone while listening to your friend talk abouther day, she can tell you aren’t actually interested, even if you say you are.-The amount of personal space a person gives/takes away also says a lot about themessage received, and the level of comfort between the two people.-Culture has a major influence on how non-verbal communication is interpreted -Ex: in the U.S. it is polite to make eye contact while talking to someone, butin other cultures it can be seen as extremely disrespectful. -As culture has become more modern, we have become more dependent upontechnology as a form of communication. This can lead to difficulty interpreting thetrue emotions of the conversation.Sex Differences in Communication-Women typically use communication to build and establish relationships, theycommunicate to connect and relate to other people, while men approachcommunication as a way to receive vital information.-Women are more likely to smile, make eye contact, and make facialexpressions, and use their bodies more.-Men are straight to the point and assertive with their communication.-When communicating, women use both sides of brain, while men primarilyuse the left hemisphere (analytical side).Conflict, Communication, and Problem Solving-Conflict: disagreements over decision making, problem solving, or achieving goals,which can result from difference between group members.-John Gottman claims the way couples solve conflict can reflect upon the future ofthe relationship-Conflict can either be solvable or perpetual.There are many different types of conflict:-Pseudoconflict: when we falsely perceive that our partner is interfering with ourgoals or has incompatible goals (easiest conflict to manage).-Content Conflict: occurs when we disagree about information. Ex: you believe theparty starts at 8, but your partner thinks it starts at 9 (harder to manage thanpseudoconflict).-Value Conflict: results from the differing opinions on personal and core topics suchas politics or religious beliefs (harder to manage than content conflict).-Ego Conflict: arises when the individual believes they need to win at all costs (mostdifficult to manage). -Conflict Styles: see figure 6.4 in book-Avoiding style = “leave me alone” = lose- lose-Accommodating style = “whatever you say” = lose-win-Competing style = “my way or the highway” = win-lose-Compromising style = “if you do…I’ll do….” = lose-lose -Collaborating style = “lets work on finding a solution” = win-winIntimacy, Communication, and Conflict-Gottman claims that if the ‘4 horsemen of the apocalypse’ all exist together = badrelationship.1. Criticism: making negative evaluations of your spouse’s behavior/feelings.2. Defensiveness: defending yourself when you feel attacked in an argument.3. Stonewalling: withdrawal technique, the silent treatment, ignoring spouse.4. Contempt/Belligerence: trying to establish power, making the otherperson feel inferior to you, typically with non-verbal behavior. (Principle ofLeast Interest)-Possible to suffer ‘emotional flooding’, where you are filled with emotions andburst out something you regret.-Regulating Couples: use communication and to promote closeness and intimacy.-Non-Regulated Couples: have many negative communication exchangesPower, Control, and Decision Making-Power: the ability to exercise your will-Personal Power: the degree of autonomy a person has to exercise his or her ownwill. Ex: I can control myself from eating the whole pizza.-Social Power: the ability to exercise your will over another person. Ex: cops haveauthority over typical citizens.-Intimate Partner Power: involves decision making among intimate partners, theirdivision of labor, and their sense of entitlement.Power Theories-Resource Theory: suggest that the spouse with the more prestigious or higher-paying job has more leverage in decision making. Chapter 7: Marriage-Marriage: legally and socially recognized relationship that includes sexual,economic, and social rights and responsibilities for
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