Chapter 11 Power and Violence in Marriages and Families o What is power Who has power Who doesn t have power Power Types of Power o Coercive power To punish another individual force them to do something with the threat of punishment Ability to reward someone Praise Monetary Attention o Reward Power o Expert Power Power someone has over someone else when they have expertise over another A Professor o Informational Power Power you have when you have information that someone else doesn t have like blackmail u heard info that smoking is bad for u n u tell your smoking bf U don t have to be an expert o Referent Power o Legitimate Power A person who doesn t have very much power gives power to someone else We give power to the president or your boss Type of power given to someone by another body entity or person For ex Police officer is given power by the state of Florida to enforce the law Attorneys also Marital Power how spouses share the power that they have o First studied in the 1950 s o Blood and Wolfe Interview wives only asked them who has power to make decisions Resource hypothesis Blood and Wolfe s hypothesis the spouse with more resources has more power in marriage o Women and Men Brought resources But men s resources were valued more o Study Results Most families 72 of wives had relatively egalitarian decision making structure Both make decisions 25 of wives said husbands made decisions 3 of wives said they made decisions Criticisms of Study o What domains men and women have power over o Women Food shopping cleaning o Husbands where they live jobs finances o Having the power to make trivial decisions is not the same as having the power to make important ones Resources and Gender o Men tend to have more resources Money Education Physical strength Alternatives to marriage Status o Women tend to be most equal with men at the beginning of marriage and birth diminishes women s resources First pregnancy Female may take time off and lose income Dependent on males to be father and earner Have less energy to resist dominance of husband Children somewhat force them into these gender roles o Culture resources and gender Resource theory does not explain everything Culture gives husbands absolute legitimate power Interaction of legitimate and resource power o Legitimacy and resources Culture gives husbands power and husband s have greater resources husband will be dominant Culture gives husband power and husband has less resources than wife husband will be dominant Culture does not give husband power and husband has greater resources than wife husband is probably dominant Culture does not give husband power and husband less resources egalitarian marriage or wife dominant 75 of them man dominates o Power and social class Most social classes perceive that they have egalitarian marriages not always true Upper class marriages are least likely to be egalitarian Lower and Middle class marriages are more likely to be egalitarian Because both partners probably have to work both bring resources and are vital o Future of marital power Working women are happier in their marriages More financial freedom go shopping buy whatever u want Psychosocial benefits go to work u develop your own identity as a professional learn that u are good at things Mutually economically dependent couples Couples in which each partner earns 40 50 of the couples income o If they don t feel valued they may leave o Gives women more power Four Couple Types Women s resources may be increase in value Caring emotional support warmth nurturing Women gaining more power Equality between men and women may occur in overall society o Heterosexual married heterosexual cohabiting lesbian and gay Heterosexual couples are the least egalitarian more power differences no matter if it is married and cohabitating o Married and cohabitating heterosexuals least egalitarian o Gay and lesbian share domestic duties more including child rearing No women and men roles it is more equal o Gays more competitive lesbians are more relationally focused Types of Marriage o Peer marriages At least a 60 40 or 50 50 o Near Peer marriages Partners want to have equality but are influenced by arrival of children and maximizing income o Traditional marriages Husband dominates but wife is okay with it Power and Intimacy o Intimacy is greatest when power is equal If someone feels less power AND is unhappy about it there is less closeness o No power equal power in relationship o Seek to negotiate and compromise not to win Power politics o How do spouses exert power in a marriage Leaving or threatening to leave Withholding distancing emotionally sexually physically financially Pouting sulking letting your partner know your unhappy with them Infidelity Letting your partner know u have other options cheat the rules o Accumulation of power politics leads to loneliness and distance in marriage at least for one partner if not both Alternatives to power politics not limited to marriage o Partners take charge of separate domains separate things in a relationship you take care of bills I take care of housework May decrease intimacy Reinforces separateness o Subordinate lesser spouse disengages from power struggles The least powerful one says they don t care anymore and gives up o More powerful partner relinquish some power to save or enhance the marriage This is the best alternative o All forms of abuse have at their center the exploitation of a power Family Violence difference In other terms someone stronger older etc o Child abuse elder abuse husband abuse o Dating violence domestic violence sexual coercion Three phase cycle of violence o Tension resulting from some minor altercation builds over a period of time o Situation escalates exploding into another violence episode o Violent person becomes contrite apologetic treating his her spouse or partner very lovingly says they are sorry promises to change honeymoon phase o Stage Three keeps the cycle going because they keep apologizing o As cycle is repeated the violence usually increases in frequency or o The more times the cycle is repeated the less time It takes to severity complete it Power and Control Wheel Why abusers do it o At the center of violence Physical or Sexual is Power and Control Using emotional abuse isolation minimizing denting and blaming using children using male privilege using economy abuse using coercion and threats using intimidation o Feelings of powerlessness o Lack of resources o Insecurity you
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