SPC FINAL 7 19 13 Interpersonal Relationships and Evaluating and Improving Relationships Interpersonal Communication is one person interacting with another on a one to one basis often in an informal unstructured setting Two approaches to interpersonal communication 1 Situational Approach Focuses on elements of interpersonal Process environment message feedback Contexts Nature of messages intentional nonverbal formal Effects of variables on the success of a given interpersonal communication Interaction noise familiarity with language used clothing Examine individual parts in order to understand the process 2 Developmental Approach Focuses on interaction and relationships relational development maintenance disintegration ex How self concept affects dating relationships change in eye contact with relationship stage changes how TV viewing affect communication in families Emotional Intelligence is the ability to understand and get along with others Being self aware Manage emotions Motivating yourself Recognizing emotions in others Handling relationships Entry phase in relation Information demographic Communication guided by rules and norms Personal Phase in relation Information attitudes values and beliefs Communication more freely and less rules Perception Self Concept Emotional Intelligence Uncertainty Reduction Theory Uncertainty is unpleasant and therefore motivational people communicate to reduce it Exit phase in a relation Information less to none Communication planning future interaction phases mostly avoiding communication Tips for beginning conversations breaking the ice Introduce yourself in a way that gives the other person a way to respond to you Give people a way to remember your name Personalize your greeting Small Talk social conversation in which the topic is relatively unimportant Social Exchange Theory Human interaction is like an economic transaction argues the major force in interpersonal relationships if the satisfaction of both people s self interest weighing and bartering of rewards and costs Evaluating Relationships Rewards and Costs Intrinsic means within the relationship o Intrinsic costs the obligation to return the attention warmth and affection you receive and the time you will spend listening communicating and self disclosing o Intrinsic rewards the gifts prizes and recompenses that occur within a relationship could include the attention warmth and affection you gain from being in a relationship Extrinsic means outside the relationship o Extrinsic costs the sacrifices losses or suffering as a result of things that occur outside the relationship could include not having as much time for your friends or sharing your friends with your partner o Extrinsic rewards the gifts prizes and recomposes that occur outside a relationship could include liking the people your partner has introduces you to or the friends he or she hangs out with Instrumental o Instrumental costs the problems associated with relationships o Instrumental rewards the pleasures that come as a result of being in a relationship Motives for Interpersonal Communication Pleasure affection inclusion escape relaxation control health and cybermotivation Social engagement theory says we expect Reciprocity reputation influence altruism self efficacy and direct reward Social Penetration Theory Onion model Key Points peripherals exchanged more frequently self disclosure is reciprocal rapid start which slows quickly exit is gradual Self disclosure is a process in which one person tells another something he or she would not reveal to just anyone Reveals Cultural information information used in making predictions based on a person s most generally shared cultural attributes such as language shared values beliefs and ideologies Sociological information information that tells you something about others social groups and roles Psychological information the kind of information that is the most specific and intimate because it allows you to know individual traits feelings attitudes and important personal data Johari Window Known to others Not known to others Known to self open hidden Not known to self blind unknown Self disclosure and fears fear of having your faults exposed fear that your partner will become your critic fear of losing your individuality fear of being abandoned Attraction to others Factors that make up attraction to others Physical attraction Perceived gain Similarities Differences Proximity the close contact that occurs when people share an experience such as work play or school Stages of a Relationship Coming together 1 initiating 2 experimenting 3 intensifying 4 integrating 5 bonding Coming apart 1 differentiating 2 circumscribing 3 stagnating 4 avoiding 5 terminating Knapp s Stages of Relational Development Variables that influence relationships Transactional variables Control Trust Intimacy Relational variables Commitment Time Rules Intensity Immediacy your degree of like or dislike for that person Improving Relationships Negative influences Aggressive talk and aggression Regrettable talk Criticism and complaints Avoidance Defensive communication Improving Interpersonal Communication I statements owned messages Behavior Feelings Explanation Connection FTF vs CMC face to face communication versus computer mediated communication Media richness Available channels Asynchronous vs synchronous Anonymity Time needed for communication Cyberattraction Cues of attractiveness in the cyber world Attentive and sensitive process of negotiation Stimulated proximity Strategic management of the similarity of perceptions Attracting attention and interest Humor Self disclosure CMC Pros Support system for interpersonal relationships Includes otherwise marginalized people CMC Cons Social disengagement Internet addiction 7 24 13 Intercultural Communication and Listening Role of Intercultural Communication In communicating effectively Communication skills determine how well knowledge is acquired and applied With globalization the knowledge class is growing and becoming more important In strategic flexibility Learning how to communicate in a culture Intercultural communication influences the communication model Effects Senders and receivers in communication situations those who simultaneously send and receive messages Messages and feedback o Message the ideas and feelings that a sender receiver wants to share o Feedback the response of the receiver senders to each other Setting where the communication occurs