COMM 315 1st Edition Lecture 13 Outline of Last Lecture I. Nonverbal Communication Codes (Continued)II. How to Improve Your Skill in Interpreting Nonverbal MessagesIII. How to Improve Your Skill in Expressing Nonverbal MessagesIV. Gender Differences in Interpreting Nonverbal MessagesV. How to Accurately Interpret the Nonverbal Expression of EmotionVI. Saying it Without Saying it OnlineOutline of Current Lecture I. Conflict DefinedII. Conflict MythsIII. Conflict TypesIV. Gender ConflictV. Conflict and PowerCurrent LectureChapter 8: Conflict Management Skills- Why Study Conflict?o 5 Reasons Prevent conflict from escalating to violence Conflict interactions are often confusing Achieve personal goals Affects your health Natural, inevitable event- Conflict Definedo Interpersonal Communication- an expressed struggle between at least twointerdependent people who perceive incompatible goals, scarce resources or interference in the achievement of their goalso Conflict elementsThese notes represent a detailed interpretation of the professor’s lecture. GradeBuddy is best used as a supplement to your own notes, not as a substitute. An expressed struggle- As conflict evolves in a relationship, it as the potential to escalate into physical abuse, especially in our most intimate relationships Between at least two interdependent people- You are more likely to have conflict with people that you spend time with because you are connected to them in some way.- Interdependent- dependent on each other; one person’s actions affect the other person Incompatible goals, scarce resources, and interference (perceived)- conflict often happens because two people want the same thing, but bothcan’t have it, or because what one person wants it the opposite of what the other wants. Achieving a goal- Understanding what the individuals in conflict want is an important step toward finding a way to manage the conflicto Conflict as a Process Source: Prior Conditions- begins when you become aware that there are differences between you and another person Beginning: Frustration Awareness- at least one of you becomes aware that the differences in the relationship are increasingly problematic. Middle: Active Conflict- when you bring your frustration to the attention of other, a conflict becomes an active expressed struggle End: Resolution- when you begin to try to manage the conflict Aftermath: Follow Up- involves dealing with hurt feelings or managing simmering grudges, and checking with the other person to confirm that the conflict has not retreated into the frustration awareness stage Constructive conflict- conflict that helps build new insights and establishes new patterns in a relationship- Focuses attention on problems that need to be solved- Clarifies what may need to be changed- Focuses attention on what is important to you and your partner- Clarifies who you are and what your values are- Helps you learn more about your partner and what’s important to them- Can strengthen relationships because you feel you can manage your disagreements Destructive conflict- conflict that dismantles rather than strengthens relationships- Lack of responsibility when responding to others- May show verbal or physical abuse, stalking, hate crimes- Doesn’t do much goodo Conflict Triggers- common perceived causes of interpersonal conflict. Common triggers include: Criticism Feeling entitled Perceived lack of fairness More Perceived costs than rewards Different perspectives- Power- who’s in charge- Social issues- politics and religion- Personal flaws- such as using drugs or alcohol, smoking, or laziness- Distrust- concern about whether one person is telling the truth- Intimacy- differences about the frequency and timing of sex- Personal distance- as evidenced by the amount of time each person commits to the relationship Stress and lack of rest Dialectical tension- tension arising from a person’s need for two things at the same time- Being separate and connected- we want our freedom, but we also want the comfort, predictability, and convenience of having someone who is a consistent part of our life- Feelings of being open and closed- we want to share and disclose our thoughts and feelings, but we also want our privacy and secrecy.- Conflict Mythso Myth 1: Conflict is always a sign of a poor interpersonal relationship The free expression of honest disagreement is often a hallmark of healthyrelationships Assertively and honestly expressing ideas may mean that a person feels safe and comfortable enough with his/her partner to disagreeo Myth 2: Conflict can always be avoided Conflict arises in virtually every relationship It would be extraordinary for us always to see eye to eye with another person Conflict is a normal and productive part of interaction in group deliberationso Myth 3 : Conflict always occurs because of misunderstandings The problem is usually that two people disagree about whose goal is more important. Disagreements aren’t always a lack of understanding, but the source of the conflicto Myth 4: Conflict can always be resolved Some disagreements are so intense and the perceptions so fixed that individuals may have to agree to disagree and live with it- Conflict Typeso Pseudoconflict: Misunderstandings  Pseudoconflict- conflict triggered by a lack of understanding and miscommunication Unless the misunderstanding is cleared up a real conflict might ensue You can minimize misunderstandings before they occur by- Checking your perceptions- Listening between the lines- Establishing a supportive rather than a defensive climate for conversationo Simple Conflict: Different stands on the issues Simple Conflict- conflict that stems from different ideas, definitions, perceptions, or goals. You understand each other, but you disagree; individuals disagree over which action to pursue to achieve their goals You can keep simple conflict from escalating into personal attacks by- Clarifying your and your partner’s understanding of the issues and your partner’s understanding of the source of the disagreement- Keep the discussion focused- Look for more than just the initial solution- Don’t try to tackle too many issues at once- Find the kernel of truth in what your partner is saying- If tempers begin to flare, cool off.o Ego conflicts: Conflict gets