COMM 10001nd Edition Lecture 12 Outline of Last Lecture I. Maintaining RelationshipsII. Becoming a FamilyIII. DivorceIV. ConflictV. Levels of ConflictA. IntrapersonalB. InterpersonalC. IntragroupD. IntergroupVI. Stage of ConflictVII. Kilmann and Thomas Model of Conflict ResolutionA. AvoidanceOutline of Current Lecture VIII. Kilmann and Thomas ModelA. CompetitionB. CompromiseC. AccommodationD. CollaborationThese notes represent a detailed interpretation of the professor’s lecture. GradeBuddy is best used as a supplement to your own notes, not as a substitute.IX. NegotiationX. Six-Step Model of NegotiationA. AnalyzingB. PlanningC. OrganizingD. Gaining/MaintainingE. ClosingF. Continuous ImprovementXI. Principled NegotiationXII. Four “Rules of Thumb”XIII. Precursor to EthicsXIV.RelationshipsXV. LyingXVI. Intimates and Lie DetectionCurrent LectureKilmann and Thomas Model –Competition (win – lose)- Competition is characterized by attempts to “defeat” the other party1. Strategies used in competition include a range of behaviors such as:a. Faulting other partyb. Hostile questioningc. Hostile jokingd. Presumptive attribution e. Prescription 2. Advantages of the competitive approach include stimulation of creativity and energy3. Disadvantages include possible harm to relationship and forcing the other party toresort to “underground” tactics like sabotageKilmann and Thomas Model –Compromise (win/lose – win/lose)- Compromise refers to sacrifices that can be either mutual or counterproductive1. Advantages of compromise include the possibility of easy resolution of the conflict2. Disadvantages are the use of compromise as an easy way out of truly resolving the conflict and prevention of more creative and satisfying solutionsa. Doesn’t always last longKilmann and Thomas Model –Accommodation (lose – win)- Accommodation refers to the sacrifice of one’s own goals for the sake of harmony1. Continued use results in chronic suppression of needs that will surface eventually2. Advantage of the approach: it reflects commitment-concern for the relationship3. Disadvantage of accommodation is that it can be one-sidedKilmann and Thomas Model –Collaboration (win – win)- Collaboration involves both parties working cooperatively toward a solution1. This approach requires greatest commitment to relationship2. Collaboration is characterized by use of such tactics as:a. Qualification (limiting discussion to issues at hand)b. Exchange of needs and feelingsc. Show of empathy and supportd. Emphasis on commonalitiese. Acceptance of responsibilityf. Initiation of problem solving3. Leads to the most effective resolution4. Disadvantage is that it requires cooperation of both partiesNegotiation- - Negotiation is a means of resolving conflict defined by Walker and Harris as “the process of resolving differences through mutually acceptable tradeoffso Elements of cooperation and competition are found in all social exchanges- Perceptions of fairness in exchanges influence the outcomes of these exchanges- The negotiated or reciprocal nature of the exchange influences per-ceptions of fairness- Reciprocal exchanges are perceived as more fair than negotiated onesThe Six-Step Model of Negotiation-1. Analyzing the negotiation situationa. Objectives?b. Own and other’s needs?c. Environment?2. Planning for the upcoming negotiationsa. Importance of this step often underestimatedb. The complex and evolving nature of negotiations, as well as various “stumbling blocks” have helped create Negotiation Support Systemsc. Money, people, and timing are usually at the center of negotiationsd. Make a plan in terms of relevant issues:- Strategies to use- Location- Agenda- Process, etc.**80-20 rule: 20 represents the time, 80 is what you are going to get out of what you want; you get the 80% in the last 20% of time3. Organizinga. Select people and planb. Decide on opening offerc. Decide on limits of offerd. Practice negotiating4. Gaining/maintaining controla. Try to be involved in agenda preparationb. Try to have input in process5. Closing the negotiationsa. Be creative to find best solutionsb. Stay open to possibilities6. Continuous improvementa. This is the most overlooked stepb. Check on decisions and resultsc. Review negotiation (what can be done better next time?)Five negotiation styles have been identified-Integrating – collaborates, works with other partyObliging – concedes, yields, strives to accommodate otherDominating – uses power and authority to achieve own goalsCompromising – looks for “middle ground”, negotiates and tries to avoid unpleasantnessAvoiding – tries to avoid overt disagreementPrincipled Negotiation- decides an issue based upon its merits and gets away from traditional notions of negotiation which emphasize getting the other side to “come over” to your positionFour “Rules of Thumb”1. Separate people from the problem- Address issues while respecting people- Psychological and substantive needs should be met2. Focus on interests, not positions- Search for mutually agreeable possibilities- Avoid seizing a position and holding on to it- Ask questions and listen to answers3. Invent various options for mutual gain- Don’t jump to a solution- First, analyze criteria for problem and solution4. Use objective criteria- Use mutually agreed-upon information to back claims- Don’t just lock into perceptions of each sideTechniques for Principled Negotiation-- Ask questions without attackingo Not making hostile environment- Recognize contributions of others- Gain agreement on factual informationo Understanding their reasoning- Check for understanding- Ask for help in understanding reasoningChapter 7: A Precursor to Ethics-Relationships-- Many relationships have a rule like “we’ll be honest with each other”o “Do I look fat? How was dinner? Isn’t this vacation the best?” and so on- Is this goal (rule) consistent with other relational goals?o Supportive climate- People in relationships report telling fewer lies (than to people outside the relationship)- “The person who is brutally honest will be a very lonely person.” (O’Hair & Cody, 1994, pg. 196)Lying and Relationships-- Nondisclosure about infidelity seems to fall clearly under the nonviable lie category according to Knapp and Vangelisti based on the fact this is a violation of a relational rule for most couples- Research shows that 99% of individuals expect