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SU CFS 425 - Love and Emotions pt.1

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CFS 425 1st Edition Lecture 2 Outline of Current Lecture 1. What is this Love? “ Love and Emotion Current Lecture- Finished up talking about the components of Attraction Pt. 1- Homogamy vs. complementarity - Started a new chapter on Love: what is love? How do we define Love? These notes represent a detailed interpretation of the professor’s lecture. GradeBuddy is best used as a supplement to your own notes, not as a substitute.We remember the components of love to be :- Reciprocity - Balance/Reward- Equity- Social Exchange - Liking/ Matching- Familiarity/ Similarity (homogamy)/Proximity We then have something called Homogamy vs. ComplementarityHomogamy- we like those who like us whereas Complementarity is we tend to like others who exhibit desirable qualities that we wish we had.Functional Complementarity is we are the perfect matches basically he/ she compliments me. Example :I can be an anger person and rowdy, but when my boyfriend is around he calms me down and I’m more relaxed. Complimenting each other personalities Mate selection- it happens with accuracy and because we carry psychic function for each other. Emotional/ Psychological Complementarity- You may be the person I want to be. We like people that have personalities or certain characteristics we wish we had ourselves. We look for something we might not have in ourselves. Intergenerational Connection- Certain people carry unresolved emotional issues that they had with their parents to new relationships.Example: Never was very close or affectionate with your parents, so you wont really know how to show that to your partner. That carried on to relationships with other people. Fatal Attraction- Say you were drawn to something about your partner when you met them that was appealing and attractive. But later on it gets really annoying to you. Love - Love is an expressed felling and activity - Love is grounded in evolution/biology/chemistry= Love physiology - Love is intimacy, caring. Commitment for another person. What is falling in love like-- We might act “trance like”- Sudden and intense- Scared- not sure what to do - Giddy- Blinded- Focusing on the partner and forget about other people and what they think- Amazing/happyLove is like a natural high also known as:Biochemical Theory- Brain scans show that when you look at a picture of someone you are in love with the parts of your brain that are activated are the same as those activated when eating chocolate, taking cocaine, or gambling Love PhysiologyThere are different love types: 1. Explorer (Dopamine System)- Creative/ spontaneous/ Energetic2. Builder (serotonin)- Calm/social/popular 3. Director (testosterone)- Direct/ decisive/Completive/ambitious4. Negotiator (Estrogen) – Flexible/compassionate/ imaginativeSternberg’s Triangular Theory of LoveIntimacy Passion Decision/Commitment Intimacy- Feelings of warmth, understanding, communication, support, and sharingPassion- Emotions and sexual desires Decision/ commitment- Decision to stay in a relationship and to work to maintain it Styles of love by Lee’s Six ( types of relationship) 1. Eros - emphasizes passion, eroticism, and sexual energy. Like sensual and attracts to beauty.2. Ludus- playing the field and seek many sexual conquests. Love is a game(game knows game). They rather play a game than fall in love 3. Storge- Love between companions 4. Agape- Selfless all giving love. Putting someone’s importance before your own. 5. Pragma- select romantic partners based on rational, practical criteria. More of a logical approach.6. Mania- Mania lovers are insecure in love and obsessively cling to their partners. Sleepless nights/ pain and anxiety when away from


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