HD 204 1nd Edition Lecture 19 Outline of Last Lecture I. Development of IntimacyII. CommitmentIII. Self-DisclosureIV. Intimacy and Sex in Partner RelationshipsOutline of Current Lecture II. Sexual ScriptsIII. Sex and Partner RelationshipsIV. Parent-Child CommunicationV. Factors in IntimacyCurrent Lecture- Sexual Scripts:o More contemporary sexual scripts are not so gendered.o Most durable gender difference is sexual double standards.- Sex and Partner Relationships:o Communication in the bedroom starts in other rooms.o The ability to talk about sex is link to satisfaction.o Couples in long-term sexual relationships may be more satisfied.o Sexual relationships change over the life cycle.- Parent-Child Communication:o Mothers discuss sex more with children, especially the daughters.o Girls who talk with their moms are: More likely to have conservative values. Less likely to engage in sex. More likely to consistently use condoms.o Some parents still don’t want to talk about sex.o Some parents want to talk about it but know how.o Not talking about sex still send a message that it is bad.- Factors in Intimacy:o Effort. Putting time and energy into a relationship. Gottman’s love map.These notes represent a detailed interpretation of the professor’s lecture. GradeBuddy is best used as a supplement to your own notes, not as a substitute.- What’s your partner’s favorite/least relative?- What’s your partner’s current worries?- Who is your partner’s best friend?- What was your partner’s most stressful childhood event?- What is your partner’s dreams?o Sacrifice. Setting aside self-interest.- Examples.o Relocating for partner’s career.o Working extra shifts.o Quitting smoking.o Skipping a road trip to go a sibling’s graduation.o Forgiveness. Involves:- Acknowledging person’s action as harmful.- Transforming psychological state.- Offer reconciliation.- Renegotiating relationship. Obligatory nature of family relationship motivates us to forgive. Some are too hard to forgive.o Fears of intimacy: Merger; loss of boundaries. Exposure; will expose weakness. Attack; lack of trust in others. Abandonment; feeling alone.o Jealousy. Perception that valued relationship is being threatened.- Results in distance, negativity, avoidance, and violence.o Couples.o Siblings.o Deception. Intentionally withholding information or communicating false information.- Violates expectation of commitment.- Loss of trust.- Leads to
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