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WSU HD 204 - Intimacy

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HD 204 1st Edition Lecture 8 Outline of Last Lecture I Relational Maintenance Strategies II Relational Currencies III Bids IV Rituals Outline of Current Lecture I Intimacy II Commitment III Self disclosure IV Intimacy and Sex in partner relationships V Parent child communication about sex Current Lecture I Intimacy a What is intimacy Intimacy involves A close familiar and usually affectionate or loving personal relationship A detailed and deep knowledge and understanding from close personal experiences Marital intimacy also includes sexual relations b Development of intimacy Limits of intimacy reflect how families manage Dialectical tensions Boundaries Biosocial issues Need for and comfort with intimate ties change over time These notes represent a detailed interpretation of the professor s lecture GradeBuddy is best used as a supplement to your own notes not as a substitute Altman and Taylor s Social Penetration Model Orientation Exploratory Effective Exchange Affective Exchange Stability Orientation first impressions Exploratory Effective Exchange acquaintance no commitment Affective Exchange Close friendships courtship Stability Commitment Limitation not all family relationships are formed voluntarily c Interaction that promote intimacy involve II Confirmation Commitment Self disclosure Sexual communication Forgiveness Commitment a Degree to which we are willing to work for the continuation of the relationship b Internally and externally imposed constraints Personal dedication Ought to and have to stay together c Relationship turning points points where relationship either goes to a higher level of intimacy or it dissolves Direct efforts Indirect Efforts III Secret tests Self disclosure a Revealing information about oneself involves taking a risk b Trust in partner is foundation of self disclosure c Results in intimacy when partner responds with validation understanding empathy d Dimensions of Disclosure Breadth Superficial information shared with many people and early in the relationship outside of onion Depth Significant information shared with few people and later in the relationship core of onion e Partner relationships f Responsiveness of partner promotes intimacy Disclosure of negative feelings often met with rejecting or disconfirming messages Women more likely to disclose Curvilinear relationship of disclosure and satisfaction Too much disclosure does not allow for individuality g Parent child relationships Which parents are likely to receive self disclosure Mothers Those perceived as warm nurturing Cohesion and adaptability Nature of topic h When is self disclosure likely to occur IV Debriefing conversations Developmental or unpredictable stresses Intimation sequences Intimacy and Sex in partner relationships a Intimacy sexual relationships b Sex is both a form of communication and a reflection of communication c Sexuality and behavior reflect gender socialization d Sexual scripts Expectations for how to behave sexually Who age who is acceptable in your mind Do they have to be the same race Same sex What Range of behaviors that are acceptable When in front of parents vs when out Where Where you are Why Lot of variations for why e Gender differences f V Focus on sexual experience Men sexual attraction and desire Women Romance and Love Sexual activity is tied to Men Masculinity Women Reproduction and family life Role during sexual experience Men Initiator director lead actor Women Passive recipient of pleasure Appropriate level of sexual experience and expertise Men High Women Low Sex and Partner Relationships Communication in the bedroom starts in other rooms Ability to talk about sexual relationship linked to satisfaction Couples in long term sexual relationships may be more satisfied Sexual relationships over the life cycle Parent child communication about sex a Mother discuss sex more with children especially with daughters b Girls who talk with their mom about sex are More likely to have conservative sexual values Less likely to have engaged in sexual activity More likely to use condoms consistently c Some parents still don t want to discuss sex even when their teens do Why is this d Some parents want to discuss sex with their children but don t know how to e Not talking about sex still sends a message


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