HD 204 1st Edition Lecture 7 Outline of Last Lecture I. Functions of SecretsII. Factors Influencing the Effect of SecretsIII. Family Networks and NarrativesIV. How family stories are toldOutline of Current Lecture I. Relational Maintenance StrategiesII. Relational CurrenciesIII. BidsIV. RitualsCurrent LectureI. Relational Maintenance Strategiesa. What is relational maintenance?- “Everyday stuff” that involves keeping a relationship- In existence- In a state of connectedness- In satisfactory condition- In repairb. Maintenance Strategies- Positivity- Openness- Assurance- Social Networks- Sharing Tasksc. Gottman’s Magic RatioThese notes represent a detailed interpretation of the professor’s lecture. GradeBuddy is best used as a supplement to your own notes, not as a substitute.- The ratio of positive to negative interactions needs to be: 5:1 in times of conflict 20:1 in times of peaced. Maintenance in other family relationships- Children and parents- Sibling relationships- Long-distance partnerships- Mediated messages vs. Face to face- Divorce and remarriagee. Relational maintenance strategies- Confirming messages- Recognition- Dialogue- Acceptance- Rejecting messages- Disconfirming messages- Conforming?II. Relational Currenciesa. Communication behaviors that carry meaningb. Ways of showing caring, love and kindnessc. Symbolic exchange processd. Family of origin influencee. Type of currencies- Listening- Touch- Sexuality- Money- Favors- Service- Giving Time- Access rightsf. Meanings and currencies- Satisfaction is tied to one’s perception of currency- Couples with similar affection exchange behaviors have higher levels of relationship satisfactiong. Gottman’s spin on currencies- Emotional bank accountIII. Bidsa. Bids: The way a person expresses what they need in that momentb. Examples: - “Do you like chocolate milkshakes?”- A hug- “You never think to call”- “Hey…”- A sighc. Responding to bids- Turning towards- Noticing big and responding to it- Turning away- Not noticing bid- Not usually mean spirited but negative effect- Turning against- Refusing bidIV. Ritualsa. Respected behaviors or events that involve- Symbolism- Emotion- Transformation- Preparationb. Serve ongoing maintenance and relational functions in the familyc. Development- As part of cultural traditions- Families develop create or invent new onesd. Goals and functions- Healthy emotional ties- Membership changes- Healing- Identifying definition/redefinition - Rites of passage - Express beliefs- Deal with contradictionse. Intergenerational Rituals- Grandparents/ grandchildren rituals- Parent/ child rituals- Blended familyf. Managing rituals- Under rutilization- Over rutilization- don’t want to get rid of ritual- Distinctiveness- Balance in stability and