HDF 304 Exam 2 Study Guide Lectures 9 15 Lecture 9 Vocabulary Transference phenomenon characterized by unconscious redirection of feelings from one person to another Valentine s Day more break ups in the month of February bad relationships are ending the ones that are already wavering Commitment and Relationship Dissolution Micro interdependence Theory commitment Self Construal How individuals perceive comprehend and interpret the world around them particularly the behavior or action of others towards themselves I vs we Cultural Differences Gives us a glimpse into commitment Interdependence The way interacting individuals influence the experiences of each other via their behavior yields outcomes for the individuals involved What are outcomes Idiosyncratic Companionship emotional involvement Intimacy physical union Security physical and relational Material Gifts Costs vs Rewards the things we sacrifice vs the things we receive Compare our outcomes to our comparison level CL Expectations within the relationship The quality of outcomes one expects from a relationship Past relationships Other s relationships social comparison Media The Mindy Project episode Culture Satisfaction Outcomes CL Satisfaction Getting what and more than you expect Compare our outcomes to our comparison levels for alternatives Alt outcomes perceived to be available elsewhere or being single Dependence Outcomes Alternatives Dependence Degree to which one relies on a relationship for outcomes Can our needs be fulfilled by other interactions To summarize 1 The couples behaviors influence each other s outcomes as they become more interdependent 2 These outcomes are compared to our Comparison levels Alternatives 3 Depending on how our outcomes measures up to these comparisons we are More less satisfied More less dependent 4 Level of Dependence then Commitment the subjective experience of dependence influences Closeness attachment loyalty obligation Intention to remain Long term orientation Three Components of Commitment ABCs of commitment A Affective feeling attached positive emotions B Behavioral intent to persist enact pro relationship behaviors C Cognitive long term orientation thinking about the dyad cognitive interdependence ease of accessibility The Investment Model Rusbult 1980 More Satisfied more committed Less Satisfied less committed Cost vs Rewards outcomes Expectancies CL Outcomes CL Lower alternatives more committed Higher alternatives less committed Other potential partners Specific or general No relationship Greater investment more committed Lesser investment less committed Irretrievable resources Children house Joint social networks Time emotions Commitment and its Consequences Stay and leave behavior Perspective taking Accommodation Derogation of alternatives Willingness to sacrifice Illusions perceived relationship superiority Fidelity less likely to cheat Lecture 10 1 Briefly review commitment 2 Discuss stages of break up divorce will come later 3 SKIP relationship cognition 4 Start discussing current relationship trends 1 Commitment Interdependence Theory We compare our outcomes to what we expect and what we can get elsewhere Our comparisons influence satisfaction and dependence to the relationship Investment Model Satisfaction positive relationship alternatives negative relationship investments positive relationship constraints Commitment influences a variety of things behavior perspective taking accommodation etc 2 Stages of Break Up When we re no longer committed to our romantic relationships we go through these five steps If one step resolves our problems then we do no necessarily break up Pathway to dissolution a Recognition of problems tends to be gradual Intrapsychic happens in our own head b Exposure of problems to partner dyadic process put cards on table begin pulling out too busy short interactions etc c Negotiations stays or go How will conflict be resolved I ll be better d Transformation of the relationship Focus on self future vs relationship future symbolic purging e g song place photos haircut etc social phase seek out others e Grave dressing account making create stories of how why ended convince self that still have market value move on 3 Cohabitation What is it Unmarried partners involved in a close personal relationship who share living quarters Quasi cohabitation couples stay together most nights but still have their belongings in separate residences More likely to ever cohabit now then they use to Current Cohabitation rates more now New pathway into marriage about 2 3 of people who are married cohabited with their partners before Who cohabits Ages 25 44 Lower SES and education curvilinear for women Women who value careers More liberal less traditional family roles Less religious Why cohabit Maximize rewards minimize costs Sexual access Easier to spend time together Share cost of living and housework Combine income and time Less travel time distance Less decisions of who will go where pick up whom Easy out Four types i ii iii iv Just part of dating practical Try things out Transition to marriage Don t believe in the institution of marriage Relationship Outcomes Premarital cohabitation is associated with Increased risk for divorce especially Serial monogamists Non Hispanic white women Worse marital communication quality Lower satisfaction Increased perception of marital instability Increased likelihood of domestic violence Explanations of Outcomes Experience aka Cohabitation Effect The experience of cohabitation CAUSES the chances of marital success to decline Selection Effect People who cohabit are fundamentally different than those who choose not to cohabit Inertia Effect Some couples who would otherwise not have married end up marrying anyways Congruent vs Incongruent Congruent Couples agree on why they are living together precursor to marriage just part of the dating process etc Incongruent Couples who live together but are not in sync about where their relationship is headed one is happy about living together while other feels that they are moving too fast no discussion about future plants o Are more likely to be associated with these negative outcomes In one sample 70 of the cohabiters were in the incongruent engaged or non engaged categories Cohabitating isn t necessarily a bad thing but you should make sure you talk with your partner about where things are headed and what you expect to get out of living together Additionally it may be best to wait until you both