FAD4265 Reading Guide2 Chapter 8 Textbook Reading Guide Chapters 8 9 10 11 12 pp 389 399 only Over the generations the purpose of marriage has moved from an economic necessity to companionship to personal growth and individual fulfillment Has the modern social order caused intimate relationships to be more or less intense Have intimate relationships become more or less fragile o More intense more fragile o Romantic partner must be all things lover friend companion playmate and parent How has the role of kin and community changed regarding support for couples as they try to build intimate relationships o Bond of strong kin networks used to be crucial but now young people are more independent What is the difference between calling and dating Which gender was more in control in each What rules govern dating o Calling courtship ritual of 1900 s where the two people would get together on their parents porch or parlor Very supervised by the parents Girl in control o Dating by 1920 s couples would go on dates without supervision Shifted dating from girl and her parents to the boy Mother s lemonade vs cokes at a shop involved money Boy in control o Rules defined by peers rather than adults Teens date less now Frequent teen daters are popular have high self esteem but have issues with parents depression and low academic achievement What are the positive and negative outcomes of dating Of online dating o Online Dating Positive Millions try and succeed Good experiences mostly Negative Danger of posting personal private information Predators sometimes use the sites Principle of least interest person with the least interest in the relationship has the power to control it Assortive mating homogamy hypergamy hypogamy o Assortive Mating who individuals choose as mates o Hypergamy marrying someone of a higher status o Hypogamy marrying into a lower status o Homogamy marrying within race class ethnicity religion or educational level Similar to self Despite an ideology that rests on personal choice the social structural influences in mate selection remain strong Difference between sexual identity sexual orientation and sexual behavior o Sexual identity self classification o Sexual orientation sexual attraction and desire o Sexual behavior how people act upon their desires Can define self as heterosexual but desire same sex people What are four major findings of the NHSLS National Health and Social Life Survey sex o Adultery is the exception not the rule Men and women are remarkably faithful 75 of men and 85 of women faithful o People divided into three categories based on how often they have 1 3 twice a week 1 3 few times per month 1 3 few times per year or not at all o Homosexuality less than 10 2 8 of men and 1 4 of women define self as homo or bi sexual 9 of men and 4 of women have had a sexual relation with same sex partner since puberty o Married couples have the most sex enjoy it most and are most likely to have orgasms 40 of married couples have sex twice a week compared to 25 for singles What is the most significant dimension of sexuality relating biological and social contexts of behavior and desire o See page 228 o Personal sexual identities and how it is projected socially According to Rubin and most other similar studies women depend on emotional attachment to call up the sexual while men rely on the sexual to spark the emotional quoted in Zinn et al 2015 p 240 What is emotion work in the love relationship and how does it relate to women vs men o Emotion Work women work on their emotions and feelings to coincide with what should be felt in order to control and direct love relationships in a useful direction Men tend to fall in love more quickly and less deliberately than women Chapter 9 Bateson notes that two individuals who marry come from different histories social networks etc and then must create a new novel household She calls this a marriage of two strangers Adults who live alone now make up one quarter of all households More than 60 of current new marriages are preceded by divorce Half of cohabiting couples eventually marry and have slightly higher divorce rates than those who did not cohabit Approximately 40 percent of children will spend some time living with their mother and her cohabiting partner before they are 16 About 1 in 6 women will never have children What is the marriage movement and what are some trends that prompted it o Trends o Seeks to strengthen marriage by raising public awareness of the benefits of marriage and providing marriage education Increased cohabitation rates Later age of first marriage More children born outside of marriage High divorce rates Benefits of marriage o Promotes healthy behaviors o Unmarried more likely to die form any cause Health suicide murder accidents etc o Aid with stressful situations o Married men live 5 years longer than single men o Enhanced sex life o Better economic resources Four factors surrounding marriage as determined by Waite that lead to these benefits of marriage o Assumes a long term contract and provides social support o Marriage assumes sharing of economic and social resources o Married couples benefit from economies of scale two can live as o Marriage connects people to each other social groups and cheaply as one institutions Marriage and poor women Do poor women value marriage What are some reasons they do not have high marriage rates o They value marriage but see it as something that they will do in the future because they will find the right man o Reluctant to marry because of past bad relationships o Value their children 5 types of enduring marriages conflict habituated devitalized passive congenial vital and total o Conflict habituated centered on tensions arguments and fights o Devitalized couples that were once in love but have drifted apart remain in relationship by duty o Passive Congenial love was not expected but marriage provided o Vital shared true intimacy in all important life matters live with and stability through each other o Total Vital common activities often including work Totally involved in each others lives The demand withdraw pattern of interaction between married couples and its relationship to gender o One partner will try to discuss a relationship problem and the other will avoid it o Women often the demand and men the withdraw Is frequency or quantity of time spent together important to marriage o Quality is more important but frequency is important too Peer marriage Where couples