What is special about peer relationships Chapter 13 Peer Relationships Peers are individuals who are close in age to one another closet usually than siblings Children are relatively equal in terms of power when they interact with Piaget suggested that children tend to be more open and spontaneous with peers when expressing their ideas and beliefs than they are with adults Children often accept adult s beliefs and rules on the basis of mere obedience rather than on the basis of understanding or agreement With peers children are more likely to openly criticize another s ideas clarify and elaborate on their own ideas and ask for their peers feedback Vygotsky suggested that children learn new skills and develop their cognitive capacities in peer interactions Highlighted the role of cooperation between peers Emphasized the ways in which children s working together helps to build new skills and abilities to convey the knowledge and skills valued by the culture Harry Stack Sullivan believed that friendships are essential for older children s sense of well being In early adolescence children begin to develop close intimate relationships with same sex peers that he called chumships Chumships provide children with their first experience of an intimate interpersonal relationship based on reciprocity and exchange between equals Young adolescents become concerned about what they can do to make their chums feel good about themselves and happy Children who are not liked by peers develop feelings of inferiority and loneliness as well as concerns about their abilities Friendships Do very young children have friends A friendship is an intimate reciprocated positive relationship between two people Even 12 to 18 month olds seem to select and prefer some children over others touching them smiling at them and engaging in positive interactions wit them more than they do with other peers When a preferred peer shows distress toddlers are 3 times more likely to respond by offering comfort or by alerting an adult than they are when a nonpreferred peer is upset Starting at around 20 months old children also increasingly initiate more interactions with some children than with others and contribute more in games with them Differences in children s interactions with friends and nonfriends By the age of 2 children begin to develop several skills that allow greater complexity in their social interactions These more complex skills tend to be in greater evidence in the play of friends than of nonfriends Especially with friends cooperation and coordination in children s interactions continue to increase substantially from the toddler to the preschool years This is especially evident in shared pretend play which occurs more often among friends than among nonfriends Pretend play may occur more often among friends because friends experiences with one another allow then to trust that their partner will work to interpret and share the meaning of symbolic actions Preschool friends quarrel as much or more with one another as do nonfriends and also more often express hostility by means of assaults threats and refusing requests The higher rate of conflict for friends is likely do in part to the greater amount of time friends spend together They are more likely to resolve conflicts in controlled ways Friends are more likely to resolve conflicts than nonfriends in ways that result in equal outcomes rather than in one child s winning and the other s losing Friends are more likely than nonfriends to continue their interactions and to maintain positive regard for one another Developmental changes in friendship While children s friendships remain similar in many aspects as the children grow older they do change in one important dimension the level and importance of intimacy The change is reflected both in the nature of friends interactions with each other and in the way children conceive of friendship In the early school years children s views of friendships are instrumental and concrete Between the early school years and adolescence children increasingly experience and define their friendships in terms of mutual liking closeness and loyalty At about nine years of age children seem to become more sensitive to the needs of others and to the inequalities among people Children define friends in terms of taking care of one another s physical and material needs providing general assistance and help with schoolwork reducing loneliness and the sense of being excluded and sharing feelings When children are about ten years old loyalty mutual understanding and self disclosure become important components of children s conceptions of friendship Both preadolescents and adolescents emphasize cooperative reciprocity equality and trust between friends Adolescent friends use friendship as a context for self exploration and working out personal problems Friendships become an increasing source of intimacy and disclosure with age as well as a source of honest feedback Young children have a limited awareness that others may feel or think about things differently than they themselves do Due to this their thinking about friendships is limited in the degree to which they consider issues beyond their own needs As children begin to understand others thoughts and feelings they realize that friendships involve consideration of both parties needs so that the relationship is mutually satisfying Support and validation Friends can provide a source of emotional support and security Friends also can provide support when a child feels lonely School age children with best friends and with intimate supportive friendships experience less loneliness than children without a best friend or with friends who are less caring and intimate Friendships may also serve as a buffer against unpleasant experiences A reciprocated best friendship is a friendship in which two children are best friends to each other Victimized children also fare better if they have a number of friendships and if their friends are liked by peers and capable of defending them Children who exhibit early problem behaviors are less likely to be victimized by peers if they have a mutual friendship than are children without a reciprocated best friendship The development of social and cognitive skills Friendships provide a context for the development of social skills and knowledge that children need to form positive relationships with other people Sex differences in the functions of friendships As children
View Full Document
Unlocking...