Refers to the lack of knowledge people have about their relationships which stem from CO 201 Final Exam Study Guide Professor Nogueira Spring 2014 Final Tuesday May 13th 3pm Chapter 9 Developing and Ending Relationships Relational Uncertainty o Self uncertainty o Partner uncertainty Your own views on a relationship Your partner s view on the relationship o Relationship uncertainty relationship Relational uncertainty can be resolved o Secret tests Not knowing where a relationship is heading not knowing how to label a Covert activities designed to reveal information about a partners involvement in a relationship ask 3rd person don t respond to call email to see what partner does o Relationship talk Discussing what you want with your partner Relational Turbulence Model developing relationships Highlights how establishing interdependence can be a source of difficulty within o In this model people move beyond the initial stages of relationship and allow partners to influence day to day experiences Ex How your life changes when you re casually dating someone vs full on relationships vs 3 years in o Suggests that is unavoidable that partners create interference or barriers to your goals Ex Morning person vs night person you want to get in shape your friend wants to go to McDonalds o Talking to partner helps figure out how to meet these goals and remain interdependent o Self disclosure Essential tool for sharing information and reducing uncertainty o Reduction in uncertainty is affected by the predicted outcome value or the rewards a person expects to get from future relationships with a new acquaintance Escalating Relationship When we develop relationships people often measures the changes based on certain events or situations Some of these events might happen quickly or early on whereas others may be more of a development over time o Types of Courtship Accelerated Accelerated Arrested Prolonged o Stages of Development Intermediate Initiating Reduce uncertainty and promote positive outcomes by the exchange of public info and following broad social norms Discover common ground shared with the partner by engaging in small talk and sharing personal though no private info Establish mutual awareness of the relationship and lay out ground Establish identity as a social unit by highlighting qualities that make the relationship unique Formally establish the relationship through public ritual Experimenting Intensifying rules Integrating Bonding Uncertainty Reduction Theory Berger In an initial interaction an individual s goal is to reduce uncertainty o This is accomplished through self disclosure Norms of reciprocity The tendency to match our own disclosures to those made by our o Ex Topic length qualities humor language politeness partners o Uncertainty reduction Process of gathering information about an interactional partner When we feel uncertainty it causes cognitive anxiety and makes us want to reduce doubt Predicted Outcome Value Theory Sunnafrank EX The desire you have to reduce uncertainty in a conversation with you new roommate vs the guy checking you out at the grocery story o High POV More talking more questions encourage disclosures Social Penetration Theory Description of relationship escalation that focuses on how communication allows partners to probe each other s self concepts o Once we have reduced uncertainty and established relationships we then look at how we can escalate those relationships usually through self disclosure Breadth Depth Concepts how much information you share Ex Politics Religion Science How deep you go into the topic you discuss Ex Pro Con of abortion economic stances Satisfying Intimate relationships have BOTH breadth and depth Rule of Distributive Justice Dictates that each partner s rewards should be proportional to his or her costs o Has to do with social exchange The voluntary transfer of personal resources from one partner to another o When reward cost exchange is proportional we have equity which leads to increased intimacy and satisfaction Rules for FWBRs Refers to an association in which friends engage in sexual activity but do not define their relationship as romantic o Emotional o Communication o Sex Rules o Friendship o Permanence o Secrecy No emotional attachments or feelings No personal info appropriate convo topics limits frequent contact No kissing in public no forms of PDA Be honest about what you re doing being friends first Relationship is temporary decide how long its going to last The extent to which you share info with others others in your social network might not be informed of te sexual aspect of friendship Chapter 10 Intimacy and Interpersonal Communication Intimacy Connection between two people that includes physiological emotional and behavioral bonds o Not necessarily in romantic relationships Components of Intimacy o Closeness Feeling union between 2 people spend time together and influence on another s actions Ex using the terms we us our or physical closeness Willingness to share information about ourselves Feeling a partner will keep us safe and protect us When trust is broken intimacy must be repaired Positive feelings we have for another that are communicated through our Non verbal affectionate behavior hugging kissing Verbal saying I love you softer tones higher pitch pet names When both partners in a relationship acknowledge and value the bond that exists between them o Openness o Trust o Affection actions o Mutuality Styles of Loving Consummate Love Liking Companionate Love etc Love is experienced in differently in different types of relationships o Intimacy o Passion Liking only intimacy Companionate intimacy and commitment Infatuation only passion Romantic passion and intimacy o Commitment Empty only commitment Fatuous commitment and passion o Consummate Love Intimacy passion and commitment Hendrick Hendrick s Love Styles Eros Agape Storge etc Eros o Beauty and sexuality o More collaborative o Rate romantic relationships as more rewarding satisfying and committed Ludus Storge Mania Agape Pragma o Love involves entertaining and exciting games Tends to avoid communication or withdraw during conflicts Associated with less satisifaction in relationships o Love is peaceful and grounded in friendship o Love is dramatic and involving elation and depression o Love is compassionate and selfless More collaborative Rate romantic relationships as more rewarding satisfying and committed o Love is practical and meets specific