Gender 3 Chapter 9 Models o Deficit model feminine individual are relationship experts Personal emotional self disclosure as key to good relationship Men need to be resociaized to be more in touch with feeling o Alternative path model different routes to build and sustain relationships Men use nonverbal Friendship o Dialogue personal feelings experiences fears problems daily lives and activities socialization o Personal disclosure talk Close connection consistent with gender o Breadth introduces friends to different aspects of each other s lives Difficult to cope with envy and competition Often discuss qualities and dimensions of relationships Friendship Men explicitly o Closeness is doing o Talking as one way rather than only and best way to build relationship o Instrumental focus men exchange favors to help one another out o Covert intimacy affection signaled through teasing friendly competition playful punches o Friendships are narrow different friends for various sphere of interest Friendship Men and women o Tension 1 women and men have sexual tension o Tension 2 sex segregated socialization when growing up o For women benefit of friendship with men Less emotionally intense relationship o For men benefit of friendship with women Access to overt emotional and expressive support Gender romantic relationship Intimacy o Heterosexual couples follow script men ask out Androgynous gays lesbians less likely to follow script o Men fall in love fast harder active impulsive sexual at beginning of relationship Women more pragmatic o Attitudes towards sexual behaviors stables Women sex as emotional Men sex earlier Lesbians wait longer than heterosexual Gay men sex sooner than heterosexual Intimacy o Women more likely to focus on relationship dynamics o Committed heterosexual relationships reflect cultural values Men are the head of the family and primary wage earner Women in charge of domestic aspects of relationship o Gay and lesbian relationships best friend relationships with added aspects of sexuality and romance Gender Patterns in committed relationships Pattern Affection Women Personal and self discursive talk Men Instrumental displays Our culture favors feminine ways of expressing affection Personal Freedom Sense of interconnectedness Our culture does not value instrumental displays Personal Freedom Sense of interconnectedness Women focus on relationships generally value connection Hetero women responsibility for relational maintenance In lesbian coupes shared responsibility Women and the second shift Men socialized for independence want greater autonomy Hetero Men not assumed to responsibility for relational maintenance Men and less domestic work Preferences for autonomy and connection Responsibility for relational health Power dynamics Women and conflict more indirect compromise Men and conflict ultimatums refusal to engage in discussion Second shift Gender and patterns of Violence o Motherhood ideology being a mother is a choice and women feel they have to meet all demands related to that choice o Men do less domestic work but it has increased since 1960s o Psychological responsibility for planning and remembering increases burdens of second shift o Consequences of second shift stress fatigue illness and resentment o Acts of violence inflected most typically by men socialized into masculine identities Patterns cut across race ethic and class line o Violent behavior is a product of gender not sex Study reported that both male and female abusers masculine gender orientation Chapter 10 Stereotypes of Women Sex objects o Appearance and sexuality reinforces cultural views of femininity o Contributions to sexual harassment almost half of working women have experienced it o Like heterosexual gays and lesbians perceived in terms of sexuality Stereotype also used to define and harass them Mother Child o Nurturing supportive deferential nature o Women expected to perform emotional labor of smiling exchanging pleasantries listening to and supporting others o Stereotypes lead to segregation of female employees o Female employees who are mothers those with children viewed as less committed to work which limits advancement o Women as less mature and competent o Viewing women as children or pets is diminutive and suggests they should not be taken seriously o Often stereotypic women as children is justified as protecting women from harsh world realities Iron Maiden o Ambitious directive competitive and tough o Unfeminine or manly o Women who are successful in the workplace do not fit one of the other stereotypes placed in this category o Men should be tough in control sturdy o Men should be ruthless aggressive and committed to work more than Stereotypes of men Sturdy Oak Fighter the family Breadwinner Masculine Norms at work Manager Male o Primary provider for the family o Identity and worth tied to this stereotype o Most effective leadership styles blend relationship and instrumental o Men and women communicate similarity judged according to gender expectations Comm Styles don t change Careers linear and full time patterns o In real life need for more flexible schedules and policies Formal Gendered Practices Leave policies Family and Medical Leave Act o Up to 12 weeks unpaid to care for new babies or sick family o In most states only companies with 50 workers required to grant Within those organization only about 60 of employees are o Many workers can t afford to take leave even when they qualify o Stereotypes situation in which woman is most often the workers who o US only industrialized nation that does not required family leave at family leaves covered take family leave full or partial salary Work Schedules In companies with 9 5 type schedule pressure o If one is really committed professional s he will start work earlier and stay later o Challenging for workers with children Women are more likely to take off work in order to provide care for their children Offering flexible schedules and eave can be cost effective for organizations help with retention Informal gender practices Unwelcoming environments for women o Language relating to sports sexuality military may bind men into a masculine community in which some women may feel unwelcomed o Women who enter traditionally male dominated fields may face resistance or outright hostility Women given unrewarding assignments is isolated from key networks treated stereotypically or sexually harassed Informal networks or old boy networks o Male o