Marital power Marriage and quality of life Married people live longer and feel better o Indicators that it is better for ones physical and mental Mentally and physically healthier people are more likely to o People with positive qualities are more likely to marry health marry and stay married and stay married o People with negative qualities who marry are more Marriage as a context for self development likely to opt out of it Develops a sense of self through love and sexual expression Self development emphasis devalues qualities of commitment trust and permanence Allowed for more flexible roles in the marriage Marital cohesion a formula Marital cohesion attraction within a marriage barriers outside a marriage available alternatives o Attraction within a marriage things that make you want to stay keep you in love with spouse help you raise kids Ex companionship emotional support affection sex o Barriers outside a marriage things that keep you in a marriage even though you are unhappy in it Ex feelings of obligation moral or religious values concern about social stigma o Mutual feelings of attraction along with other rewards are things that are most likely to keep the relationship together Vital marriages represent ideal marriage based on love and companionship spouses share true intimacy and life satisfaction Total marriages similar to vital marriages have shared intimacy but are also highly involved in eachothers activities do everything together o Next 3 types are all not satisfying marriages Conflict habituated marriages couples that bicker and quarrel regularly communication is terrible nagging sarcasm condescension and physical violence in some cases Types of marriages Factors in marital satisfaction Devitalized marriages no romantic love all about the duty and maintenance of the relationship did u pick up kids did you pay the bills need date nights Passive congenial marriages didn t expect to be couples to begin with marriage is basically a base of operation use marriage to direct energy elsewhere understand that its not love at first life relationship but rather generally ok Good balance of separation and closeness b n spouses Similarities to spouse Conflict resolution hostility in family of origin Life cycle of family o Presence of children in the home especially adolescents Perception of the relationship does your marriage fit with Fit between gender roles views about egalitarianism and what you expected household division of labor Actively religious people describe themselves as happier in marriage Power in marriage Think of power as a resource in a relationship o 1 We can use it to get what we want many conceptualizations of power come from outside the marriage literature definition of power ability to produce intended effects or get someone to do something even against his or her will o needs to be distinguished from authority which is the individuals of group s acceptance of someones right to control them power derives from the perspective of the follower one must hold a particular view of the power holder in order for certain types of power to be effective several types of power proposed o types vary based on perspective of follower consider the following types of power in the context of marital coercive power forcing someone to do something against his relationships social bases of power by French and raven or her own will o it has the capacity to punish o e g governments parents goal compliance Power and Marital Satisfaction o Shared power is associated with the highest level of reported marital satisfaction o Egalitarian couples have a higher level of agreement on the desired distribution of power than couples with hierarchical relationship o Higher rates of dissatisfaction in female dominant couples