Hunter HartnettMGMT 25029 September 20143449 Frances BerkeleyWilliamsburg, Virginia 23188Dear Professor Bailey,Our lessons and instructions on strong communication practices have strongly influenced how I have revised the Tiger Oil Company memos. The memos, written my Edward “Tiger Mike” Davis, were severely flawed in many ways. They went against almost all of the ethics and responsibilities of a public communicator in the workplace, and did not provide for a pleasant employee experience. RevisionsOf the many flaws that I found in his memos, some were much more obvious and unethical than others. Mr. Davis was in to a bad habit of specifically naming people in his memos. This was, more often than not, in regards to problems he had with their performance or actions in the workplace. While it is necessary for Tiger Mike to voice his concerns, it is extremely unnecessary for him to call them out in front of the entire office. This is where a strong majority of my changes were made. He needed to include more emphasis on the positives rather than always focus on the negatives. It would have been much more appropriate for him to voice his concerns to the employees as a whole and then, if necessary, have individual meetings with the targeted individual and discuss the problems.LanguageTiger Mike also struggled with his language and word choice throughout the memos. Many of his memos contain obscene and offensive language, and almost every memo included poor word choice that often led to,intentional or not, degrading comments regarding his employees. While some form of discipline is sometimes needed in the workplace, there is also a need for a sense of goodwill. Rather than constantly belittling his employees, he need to highlight instances where they had been successful as well. Much of this could have been avoided had he gone back and revised what he said and how he said it. For example, I implemented more words such as “us”throughout the memo to change his tone from accusative to a more appropriate tone focused on group improvement. Simple additions, such as more uses of the word “we” to signify a united work place rather than a disgruntled hierarchy, could have led to a higher workplace moral.Although not every word of Tiger Mike’s memos was flawed, a significant portion of his work is not up to the industry standard of work place communication. Sincerely,Hunter
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