Social Exchange Theory Applied to RomanticRelationshipsEmily Wang9.00 Paper III: Rewriting the TextbookNovember 6, 2004While idealistic views of sex in romantic relationships focus on sex as a private actbetween two equal partners who care about each other, it is the unfortunate fact that sexualdouble standards do exist, more obviously in the past but still to some extent today. Earlierin this chapter, we focused on evolutionary theory as one way of explaining the differencesbetween men and women. Another way of trying to explain the discrepencies between theway sex and romantic relationships are viewed by females and males is through applying theidea of social exchange theory to romantic relationships.Social exchange theory analyzes interactions between two parties by examining the costsand benefits to each. The key point of the theory is that it assumes the two parties areboth giving and receiving items of value from each other. Under this theory, interactions areonly likely to continue if both parties feel they coming out of the exchange with more thanthey are giving up–that is, if there is a positive amount of profit for both parties involved.[Baumeister and Vohs 5]Rewards and costs are important concepts that form the basis of most social exchangetheories. Rewards are exchanged resources that bring pleasure and satisfaction, while costsare exhanged resources that are perceived as a loss or punishment.The social exchange framework is useful for understanding sexuality within a relationalcontext; it focuses on what each partner gives and receives from the other. It allows one toanalyze why people choose each other as romantic partners in the first place, which partnerhas more influence in the sexual activities the two engage in, and whether or not one or bothpartners might seek sexual activity outside of the relationship. [Sprecher 32]1The basis of the social exchange theory as applied to romantic relationships is that sex in aheterosexual community is a valuable commodity that a woman gives to a man in exchangefor other commodities. Compensation for sexual intimacy might be given in the form ofrespect, commitment, love, or items of monetary value. [Sprecher 32] Explained in thisfashion, sex is primarily a female res ource, and hence women would seek to keep the price oftheir resource high, while men would seek to lower the price. There are three specific socialexchange models that are particularly relevant to sexuality that will be discussed in thissection: equity theory, outcome-interdependence theory and investment model,and the interpersonal model of sexual satisfaction.Equity theory can be summed up with four main points [Sprecher 33]: (1) Individualswill try to maximize their outcomes by maximizing the difference between perceived rewardsand costs. (2) In order to maximize individuals’ rewards, the collective individuals involvedwill tend to create systems where resources can be fairly partitioned among members of agroup. To maintain this system, individuals who treat others fairly will be rewarded, whilethose who do not will be punished. (3) Inequalities in relationships will cause the participantsto be unhappy to a degree proportional to the amount of inequality. (4) Individuals will tendto work to balance out inequalities; the greater the inequality, the harder they will work toameliorate it.Proof f or the equity theory is given by evidence that shows relationships where one part-ner feels that he or she is underbenefited will not tend to be stable relationships. [Sprecher36] Also, research shows that relationships where partners felt they were either “greatlyunderbenefited” or “greatly overbenefited” were less likely to have advanced to sexual inter-course. In addition to this, those men and women who felt they were in equal and reciprocalrelationships were more likely to say that sexual activity had begun because both members2involved desired it.The outcome-interdependence theory focuses on the rewards and costs that an in-dividual derives from a relationship. The factors that determine a individual’s evaluation ofa relationship include the actual rewards and costs, the individual’s expectation for what heor she should receive (comparison level), and the dependence an individual feels on thecontinued existence of the relationship (comparison level for alternatives, or how appeal-ing other options appear) [Sprecher 34]. Added to this theory is the idea of investments,defined here as resources an individual gives to a relationship that cannot be retreived if therelationship were to end. These investments might be in the form of time or exchanged pe r-sonal confidences or other extrinsic elements, such as mutual f riends or shared possessions.All of these investments will cause an individual to feel more committed to a relationship,independent of the satisfaction gained from rewards.The effect of feeling that one has invested in a relationship helps to determine the onsetof sexual activity in romantic relationships. [Sprecher 36] This is due to the fact thatsexual activity is one behavioral demonstration of one’s commitment to a relationship. T heinvestment model variables of rewards, costs, comparison level, and comparison level foralternatives should influence how sexually involved a relationship is.The interpersonal model of sexual satisfaction focuses on exchange within theentire relationship and the consequences of that exchange for relationship satisfaction andcommitment. In this model, sexual satisfaction is increased by three main components: thedifference b etween costs and rewards. (2) How the relationship’s rewards and costs comparewith one’s expectations. (3) How equal the relationship is between the two partners interms of costs and rewards attributed to each. It extends the interdependence theory andintroduces the idea of equality being a motivating factor in relationships.3There is a clear disparity between when men and women first expect sex to occur in aromantic relationship. Men, on the whole, tend to expect relationships to become sexualconsiderably sooner than women do. [Cohen 294, 295] When evaluating how these expecta-tions compare with men and women’s actual expe riences in relationships, it is seen that onlythe women’s expectations are a good indicator of when sex actually occurs. This suggeststhat it is women, not men, who have the most influence on when sexual intercourse occurs;women are the “gatekeepers” of