Slide 1Diagnostic Questions for Revising ParagraphsDiagnosing Topic SentencesSome paragraphs don’t really need topic sentencesSome paragraphs really do need topic sentences!Tell ‘em at the top! (Top-down paragraph structure)Paragraphs that Break the Promises of their Topic SentencesVague Topic Sentences: Example 1Vague Topic Sentences: Example 2Vague Topic Sentences: Example 3How effective is the coherence (that is, the flow in meaning and logic from sentence to sentence)?Evaluate the coherenceSlide 13Wednesday, February 20• Revising ParagraphsWriting Process MapDiagnostic Questions for Revising Paragraphs1. To what extent do the paragraph's sentences reflect unity, or "oneness" in topic, message, and purpose (goal)? 2. How effective is the topic sentence (if the paragraph needs one)?3. How effective is the coherence, or the flow in meaning and logic from sentence to sentence? 4. How effective is the pattern of idea development?5. To what extent is the structure of successive sentences coordinated when it should be coordinated?6. To what extent does the structure of successive sentences vary when it should vary?7. How effectively are successive paragraphs designed (that is, how do they look on the page)?8. How successively are ideas in paragraphs developed with appropriate support, examples, reasoning, and so on? (This question overlaps with diagnosing content.)Diagnosing Topic SentencesSteps for Detecting and Diagnosing Problematic Topic Sentences:1. Ask, "Does the paragraph have a sentence that captures the central topic, main message, and rhetorical goal? If not, does the paragraph need one?"2. Ask, "Does the topic sentence effectively capture the central topic, main message and, most important, rhetorical goal for the paragraph?3. Ask, "Is the sentence positioned effectively in the paragraph (usually at the top of a paragraph, to avoid a bottom-up structure)?"4. Ask, "Does the sentence make a specific promise, or instill a well-defined expectation, about the content to follow? And, does the content of the paragraph fulfill the topic sentence's promise?"5. Ask, "Does the sentence effectively forecast the structure or pattern of ideas that follow?"6. Ask, "Does the sentence effectively establish the logical relationship between the paragraph and surrounding paragraphs?"Some paragraphs don’t really need topic sentencesIn the following paragraph, from the body of an informative review paper, the central topic, point, and goal are implied.(1) Whitney and Stein conducted a 16-week study to examine the effects of meditation on flow-mediated brachial artery vasodilation (FMBAV), which indicates vascular health. (2) The participants, 32 females and 30 males between 22 to 36 years of age, were randomly assigned to a meditation group and a control group that, instead of meditating, viewed informational videos about meditation. (3) The results showed a significant 18% increase in FMBAV (P < .001) among participants in the meditation group; no significant change in FMBAV occurred in the control group. (4) Similar outcomes to those observed by Whitney and Stein have been reported. (5) In contrast, Levinson and other researchers have reported that meditation had no effect on FMBAV.Some paragraphs really do need topic sentences!The following paragraph is from the discussion section of a hypothetical research paper on the effects of a hypothetical treatment, positive imagery meditation (PIM), on cardiovascular health. The author’s goal for the paragraph was to answer the study’s central research question: Can PIM meaningfully improve cardiovascular health status to a degree that clinicians would recommend it to their patients?The results showed that subjects who performed positive imagery meditation (PIM) experienced small but statistically significant changes in cholesterol levels. From baseline to the end of the 3-month study, the mean HDL-cholesterol concentration increased from 34.2 to 36.7 mg/dl (P < .001). Over the same period, LDL-cholesterol decreased from 155 to 149 mg/dl (P < .001). Statistically significant changes in a favorable direction were also observed for blood pressure. In contrast, no changes were observed over the study period for levels of C-reactive protein. Topic sentence: Whereas subjects who performed PIM experienced statistically significant changes in measures of blood lipids, the changes were not large enough to recommend PIM as a clinically relevant treatment for cardiovascular disease.Tell ‘em at the top! (Top-down paragraph structure)Whereas subjects who performed PIM experienced statistically significant changes in measures of blood lipids, the changes were not large enough to recommend PIM as a clinically relevant treatment for cardiovascular disease. The results showed that subjects who performed positive imagery meditation (PIM) experienced small but statistically significant changes in cholesterol levels. From baseline to the end of the 3-month study, the mean HDL-cholesterol concentration increased from 34.2 to 36.7 mg/dl (P < .001). Over the same period, LDL-cholesterol decreased from 155 to 149 mg/dl (P < .001). Statistically significant changes in a favorable direction were also observed for blood pressure. In contrast, no changes were observed over the study period for levels of C-reactive protein.Paragraphs that Break the Promises of their Topic Sentences(1) The results of this study will provide new information that can be applied in clinical settings. (2) We propose to investigate the influence of meditative states on electroencephalography (EEG) activity in the prefrontal cortex. (3) Specifically, we will examine the EEG activity of alpha and theta waves while subjects perform 30-minute sessions of guided meditation. (4) We will also investigate patterns of neural synchrony in the prefrontal cortex during the meditation sessions. (5) Increases in the amplitude of slow alpha and theta waves have been associated with acute changes in parasympathetic neural output, which may influence cardiovascular and metabolic function.3,4,6,8 (6) Given society's widespread interest in mind-body health interventions, knowledge about the effects of meditation on brain activity is especially pertinent.Vague Topic Sentences: Example 1From: A research proposal to study how meditation influences the body's response to stressRhetorical goal for the paragraph: Present features of my proposed study that make it novel and worthwhile. (Novel features of the